Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Rolling out new copulatory products

Blader Industries, Inc. announces "Forged" and "Cast"

Blader Industries, Inc. is a world wide leader in copulatory aids and devices, with a corporate mission to improve copulation frequency and effectiveness, thereby ensuring the survival of the species.

It is our position that "Forged" is the most significant advance in breast implant material since the invention of salt, and it will revolutionize copulation.

Briefly, "Forged" provides instantaneous feedback to a gentleman when properly massaged during the commission of a foreplay act. When caressed perfectly, "Forged" emits a very long wavelength, inaudible hyposonic tone perceptable only to his subconscious, triggering receptivity in the female and instinctual mounting behavior in the partner, leading to successful completion of the copulatory act.

The research and devlopment group at Blader Industries, Inc., a crack group of engineers and scientists recently returned from their annual brain-storming chataqua on the Bikini Atoll, recognizes that copulators come in many sizes, shapes and talents.

Therefore, we have also released our companion product--"Cast". "Cast" is almost identical in every way to forged except that in addition to triggering the brain's mounting centers, "Cast" also directs subliminal information towards the brain motor centers. These cues allow for a more forgiving fine motor control of copulation in those customers for whom this is problematic.

Not intended for use with farm animals. Blader Industries, Inc. is a multinational publicly traded concern listed on the worlds major stock exchanges. This announcement contains forward looking statements that may or may not be true and is for informational purposes only and is not intended to be used as a sole source in making investment decisions.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Sir,

Your blog sucks.

fearless leader said...

Thank you so much for your insightful comment, which has been forwarded to the customer relations division of Blader Industries, Inc.

If you feel they don't address your concerns to your satisfaction, don't hesitate to contact me again.

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