Tuesday, October 24, 2006

It's Worse Than We Thought

OMG!!


Clearly, you can now understand why you've received a notice that the terrorist threat level has been changed from "Medium Rare" to "Rare", our highest level of vigilance.

My crack team of analysts have just informed me that, and I quote, "The latest JDerion tape indicates we may have erred in describing the first as "a call to jihad via the medium of interpretive dance.' Indeed, the second clandestine video appears to indicate that JDerion has acquired the capability of a Shaman, and intends to use dance as a weapon of mass destruction, mostly for deployment against iconic landmarks of major societies worldwide."

Since I can think of no landmark in this country more 'iconic' than One Blader Plaza, JDerions intentions vis-a-vis the US are quite obvious. As such I'm ordering all colleagues who work at the rank of Vice President and higher to obtain first class airfare and plan to reconnoiter at the designated chautauqua site, which is, ahem, NOT at the Bikini Atoll in case JDerion is listening.

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